As a bunch of you know, I have moved to a new town, a new church, a new situation. I spent three great years in Vernon, Texas as the youth minister for the Wilbarger Street Church of Christ. This little church in west Texas gave me more opportunitiy than I could have ever asked for with ministry. They let a guy who had no experience and no credentials a chance to work with their kids and families. I will always be grateful to this church for loving me and allowing me to love their kiddos.
I miss them a lot. More than I would have ever thought. Change is something that is anticipated with excitement, but tough to navigate. I am really enjoying my time here in Granbury, but it seems to come with some longing for something familiar. While I know that Granbury will be familiar someday, I still long for something truly familiar and safe.
What is ironic is that Vernon isn't familiar and safe by any means. Only the memory is. I guess I will have a safe and familiar place when I am home with God. He never said it would be safe or easy here. So we do our best to find a place, a home to settle here on this earth, but we should never feel satisified or truly cozy until we find our rest in God.
Will that rest come here on earth? I am not sure. Do we only drudge through life just to eek our way into heaven? Again, not really sure. I do know that my heart longs for home. Maybe that longing is wired into our systems by God to keep our focus on him and our hearts turned towards eternity, not here. Jesus never really felt at home here on earth either. He always talked about God and going back to make a place for us in heavan. Paul had an internal struggle with whether or not to stay on earth or to go home to heaven. He wanted to stay here to change lives for Christ, but he wanted to go home as well. What a paradox!
The point is that we are eternal people living in a temporary world. As a young guy, I struggle to see the marathon of life while I am busy sprinting. My soul was made for things that will last, not temporary things like where I live or things I do.
What do you guys think? These are my thoughts but I want yours as well.
Look for some more changes to the blog in the coming weeks.
Chris
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4 comments:
are you still doing Zenith?
So I'm not an avid commenter, but I'm 2 for 2, what what! (fyi, this is long...I may just copy this comment and paste it as a post on my blog)
I think it's interesting that you chose this topic, because I've been thinking and praying about this lately.
I recently heard it said that home is just a memory a family has in common. You know, I agree with that. My house or my town would not mean anything if it weren't for the memories that make it......well.....make it real, I suppose. Or, as you said, make it something familiar and safe.
When I think of rest, I think of an overwhelming comfort and peace...in a place I feel protected. I don't believe we'll ever find it here on earth, nor do I desire to search this world for it. But, I do believe that we can find rest in the arms of Jesus. When we come into His presence, no matter where we are here on this earth, there is definitely that possibility. I think to do that means that we must shift our focus. And by that I mean instead of focusing on settling in a "home" here on earth, we should focus settling in the presence of God constantly. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
I can't tell you how long I searched for a place of rest until God opened my eyes. In the midst of the storm, I would search for the stillness here on earth...the comfort I longed for, and always came up short.
I used to think that I'd be the girl that gets married, raises a family and lives in the same place forever, blah blah blah! Infact, the answer to my lack of comfort became the necessity to get married. Boy am I past that :)
As God continues to reveal to me the woman He has created me to be, and as I daily trust him more and more, I realize the only comfort, the only "home" I find and desire is in the presence of God until I can be with Him in Heaven. My "home" is wherever He leads me. I just pray that I have the trust, humility and courage to follow.
As far as my soul being set on temporary things...
I used to worry all the time about where I live and what I'm going to do with my life. And, sometimes I think (especially when I blog) my desires appear more superficial than what they truly are. But I like the way you worded that...my soul is made for things that will last. And the less I focus on myself and the more I focus on our God, the more He reveals this soulful quality in me. My prayer instead is to find and live the ministry God wants me to live.
I'll always have to die to myself everyday. I'll always have to pray for the courage to trust in our Father and hold on to him unswervingly not fearing the world but instead living every breath by faith. Our God is faithful and my hope is Heaven!
Chris,
Reading this touched me deeply, since I will surely be feeling just this way in a few short months after I make my move to OK. I love paradox, so bittersweet, particularly when it's just something cool to ponder on, not something hitting you in the gut. Leaving home and going home at the same time will be tough for sure.
Your transparency is refreshing and I encourage you to continue in it....come what may.
love and grace,
pam
Oh...and by the way....it's cooler by the lake won't work at all when it gets to be july, august, and september. ugh. Unless you're really into wakeskating or skiing or something and you mean "cooler" in the sense of "neato" or "fun".
;)
pam
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